Derek: Mom, where's Jeff?
Me: He's at the gym.
D: (giggle) I called him Jeff... because you call him Jeff.
Me: That's because he's not my dad or my brother; he's my husband. First he was my friend, then he was my boyfriend, then he was my husband.
D: Then you grew a baby.
Me (stifling): Yes, you're right.
Neighbor girl Ashley about 15 min. later: Derek, is Chloe going to have puppies?
D: No, she's not even married yet. She's only 2, so it'll be a while.
