🎶 Back Home Again ❤️ 🎶

So Miranda came home from her mission a couple weeks early to have some surgery, but I have this great excuse to still write our family history down, since her novio is still on his mission in Paris, France for the next year.  So until May 9, 2019, I'll still write a missionary letter for our blog posts.  =) 



Another John Denver song that fits our lives right now.

So it was a little bubble of time, when my siblings & I got to spend the night as adults, in & out, at my mom's... It was surreal to just decide as I sit at her house with my brothers & sisters that I was just going to stay.  Thanks to Jeff & the kids, I was able to just be a broken-hearted daughter, and set my other hats as mom & wife to the side for a minute.  You only mourn your dad's death one time in your life, and we didn't ever expect to do this so young!!

So during that time, Jeff went to a class play (last letter), a piano recital, (yes, you're seeing double - they executed their duet perfectly!)

a Battle of the Books meeting for the Playful Penguins,

a field trip, (to the Discovery Museum; the wind tunnel)

and a Pack Meeting for our little Wolf.

Since our whole family goes to Mutual now, Connor gets to pick what class he'd like to go with, since we won't leave him home alone.  This week we had a combined activity with all 155 youth... Trivia race.  Oh my gosh.  Here's the TWINS at Mutual... like I said: Oh my gosh.

So my brother Scott wrote my dad's obituary.  It was published this week, and it was so amazing.  Here are the screenshots:

While I prepared some of the funeral details: sign in sheets, memory cards, pictures for the slideshow, I had a companion.  He was so sweet, acting like a normal cat, sitting on the papers and mousepad, and comforting me - animals can tell when you're sad or sick.  They totally know.

Here are some things that came up during the preparation time:

And this same artist, who wore her "baby soup" EVERYWHERE she went and to bed.

And my eldest daughter, who LOVED to be in costume all day every day.  That was a magical time.  Let's not pretend the baby soup wasn't under the younger's dress, too.

And WOW. This popped up.

From Elder Uchtdorf's Instagram.  I really liked this because lately, I've felt very close to the spirit, and like the veil has been very thin. I've been able to see past it, in a way, clearly imagining where my dad is and how he feels.  I wish I could infuse it into everyone who is grieving, because once we have grown our faith and testimony into a larger "tree," it can carry us through times like I'm going through.  I have felt the constant companionship of the spirit these weeks.

Friday, I got to go with my mom, brothers, and sister Christi for the dressing of my dad's body in his temple clothes.  The mortuary had him dressed in trousers, etc. but my brothers dressed him in his shirt and temple robes.  It was a sacred experience; my brothers handled it so well. It was so therapeutic, again, to be with his body, something I never thought I could say.  It made it so much more real that that is just his earthly tabernacle,  It's not where he is.  He is happy and (probably with us while we prepared things, especially with my mom, and) just waiting for us to finish our earth lives so we can join him.  He'll be working hard on the other side, by assignment, to bring us closer to Christ, help us find and seal our family together, and preach the gospel to the spirits who aren't converted yet.  He is definitely in his element - he was always so excited to be exactly obedient and do the will of Heavenly Father before he pleased anyone else.  He just loved being about the Lord's errand.

Saturday was so... great.  I can't believe how much I enjoyed every aspect: 

getting there early and having a few minutes at the casket alone; 

watching my children view Dad's body and mourn together; 

realizing how impactful it was to have friends from my normal life come to lift me up, including James, who came just to give Connor a hug at the viewing for support; 

seeing people we haven't seen in so long; 

marveling at how many people traveled to come mourn & celebrate with us, filling the cultural hall to the very back, even though he had only lived there for a year;

listening to my siblings, all 9 of us, speak from our hearts at the funeral; 

surprising myself that my only tears were while all 35 grandchildren sang "Gethsemane" together; 

hearing stories about Dad that people shared; 

reconnecting with people and make plans to get together more often; 

feeling a peace I couldn't believe I was feeling; 

watching my brothers and husband carry the casket; 

being so happy at such an incredibly sad time; 

pausing as I drove away from the cemetery, to admire his beautiful silver casket one last time; 

and talking for hours to my aunts & uncles (pictured at the lunch), cousins & friends, then coming back to my mom's to just exist together, celebrate, adjust to the void - peaceful and painful all at the same time.  

Here are the pictures, including the blood moon/ super moon/ full eclipse at the end.

Ha!  For real.  Super great day in my life, 8 years ago.

And memes. So the government was still shut down.  Trump really wants his wall.

And since the government is shut down and so many people are not receiving a paycheck, Trump cancelled some of the "working" vacation trips that some people were accustomed to taking, and had still scheduled.  Namely, Pelosi's trip to Brussels/ Afghanistan.

And I still wouldn't know.  Christmas is still up in full force.  Hard to get a lot of things accomplished right now... brain fog.

Love, us, the mourning bunch.

xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoox